The race is on...

Nine days past
Fetal monitoring last night. Baby is good. (If by good you mean healthy. However if by good you mean well behaved, not so much.)

No change in me so we've set a day for induction. We go in Saturday night at 8pm to start a drug to hopefully dilate my cervix and get the process started without Pitocin.

So I didn't realise how much I disliked the idea of being induced until I went into a minor meltdown over it last night. Although I've definitely made some headway in dealing with it, I still feel like somehow I've ran the course and then faltered at the finish line. Thank God for Karl. He helps to put it in perspective and I love him for it.

What are you waiting for?

7 days past
It's not your room because that is done.
Blanket? done
Diapers? done
Your own individual birthday? done
Bassinet set up?
Funny monster hat like mommy's?
Thank you's from the baby shower?
Apartment clean?
Mommy to lose her mind?
Done, done, done, done, almost there.

 

no whining today...

6 days past
Today was Erin's birthday party. We all went to Cici's Pizza for lunch. Amanda was late. How odd. George's cell phone rings. Amanda's been in a wreck, no, wait Amanda's been hit by a car. She's talking to the police so she can't be too hurt. Right? Everything is being trickled through my father from my mother who is outside with Andie. Don't panic. Don't panic.

She is okay. She went out to start the truck, heard a noise behind her and noticed the car coming down the road had a flat. No big deal, they seemed to realise it, they were going slow, they were in the center of the road...She turns back to unlock the truck and realises the car is coming at her. They hit her artificial leg, somehow slam her wrist. (Later the passenger will say Amanda slapped him and that somehow caused the bruising. Amanda doesn't know exactly how it happened.) then they plow into the neighbors car. Amanda starts yelling at them. The driver and the passenger get out of the car. Zach comes running from the house still pulling up his pants as he goes. He does have the forethought to yank the guys keys so he can't take off. However in the hullabaloo of what to do the driver takes off on foot. Zach doesn't have any shoes on so he goes back into the house to get some on and try to track the guy down. No dice. The police come and it is revealed that the passenger has no idea who the driver is. In fact he was asleep and Amanda slapping him was the first time he knew there was trouble. (Yes, I know.) The police do find the driver he has a blood alcohol level of .13, no insurance (of course) and no driver's license (also of course) It's possible the owner of the car may have insurance but I wouldn't count on that one either. Not that a hoser who has to be drunk at 11 am really needs to make their life worse but fleeing the scene raised the crime from DUI with an accident to Attempted Vehicular Manslaughter and Fleeing the Scene of a Crime. Felony.

If you want to know why I believe in God look to Amanda. Ten years ago she overcame cancer through the miracles of God. Five years ago she was saved from a horrifying accident again because God was watching her and today God once again set his hand in front of her to protect her. Thank you for this gift.

Yes, we are still waiting...

5 days past.
Last night was frustrating. I was trying so hard to not let my hopeful thoughts be loud enough for the baby to hear. I apparently wasn't successful. 23 is kind of a lucky number for Karl and me. He came to America on November 23rd. We were married on January 23rd and we were told that we passed immigration on October 23rd. So the baby being born on that date would just be a wonderful addition to our happy 23ness. (And in wonky numerology would be good because we were 2 and now we would be 3. {23 get it?} Yes, I know that will hold true no matter when FJoC arrives.) Also Erin is the only one of Lora's kids that wasn't all "Don't have the baby on my birthday! You'll ruin my special day!!! Wahhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!"

Nope...

sigh

extra intensive waiting...

4 days past
Went back to work today and made it to 3. Yay, crazy Mommy!
Heidi called and we talked for a bit. You're gonna love Heidi.
So I've had a few contractions. I'm trying not to be hopeful and expectant and crazy but...

This could be Karl and my last time just me and him. In a way that made me sad, the same way that thinking about not being pregnant makes me sad. I can barely stand not having you to hold and touch and see and chew on your toes. However I really enjoy having you wiggle around inside me. I like the way I look and how I feel and how close we are right now. I'm gonna miss that even though what's coming is better. Oh, and sniff your head. I wanna sniff your head almost as much as I wanna chew on your toes.

So, I'm trying to keep 6 contractions in perspective but it ain't easy FJoC. Not easy at all.

waiting still...

3 days past...
Rough day. Spent the morning in the emergency room unable to breathe. Have a horrible buzzy headache that's making me very irritable. I'm pretty sure Karl is getting sick too. Oh and the roads are terrible. Sleet and freezing rain.

We are now officially past every due date given.

Lunar Eclipse

 

 

My friend Judy brought you a present today. Appropriately, yet completely coincidentally,

Goodnight Moon.

and waiting...

Two days past...
Actually I'm quite glad you didn't decide to show your face yesterday.(and so far today) Mommy has a nasty cold and last night in particular was very rough. I'm accepting the fact that you are most likely going to fall in line with all the other sister babies and come two weeks late. If you change your mind though...

Last night was fetal monitoring. The sound of baby heartbeats is very soothing. So even though I felt punky, getting to hear FJoC's for such a prolonged period of time was extremely comforting.

They were playing catch up at the clinic so there were lots of other patients and week old babies. The sound of teeny baby cries made me really want to hold my baby and soothe my baby. Soon, I know.

Waiting

One day past...

I realise all of my Zen calm and patience about the baby was purely focused on just getting through Valentine's Day. I'm trying to recenter my thoughts around the fact that there really will be a baby sometime in the next 14 days.

To FJoC
If you are waiting for Mommy and Daddy to get everything done, well there is no such thing. There's always one dish in the sink or one pair of undies in the laundry. (Trust me, you'll make that whole situation ridiculous.)

Mommy and Daddy are not perfect we leave our shoes in the living room, our jackets on the kitchen chairs and don't always wash the dishes right after a meal. We love you though and we'd really like you to come out and see us. So if you're waiting until the apartment is perfect, remember this; eventually they will just come in and get you and Mommy and Daddy will still not have learned to put their socks in the hamper.

Okay, you can come out anytime now...really.

 

After an excruciatingly long time I finally got your blanket done. See? Isn't it pretty? Yes, I know it should have only taken a few weeks instead of nine months but I've been distracted.

And look at your pretty room...

 

Doesn't your crib look inviting?

 

 

Your Aunt Cate bought it for you along with the pretty bedding. She loves you even if she doesn't really want to hold you...

And look at the pretty pictures on the wall, they are by a man named Claude Monet. You also have a really cute bunny on that shelf there.

 

The bear in the crib was Mommy's when she was a little girl. I gave her to Alyssa when she was 5 because I knew she'd get played with and then Alyssa gave her back at your baby shower. Mommy cried a lot but it was happy crying.

 

Those boxes in the corner have toys for you to play with and there's even more pretty pictures and Gonzo is sitting in your high chair. Your daddy bought him for you. Sorry there's no Camilla. At least not yet...

 

Here's our rocking chair. Your Gramma Jane bought this ages ago. I was sixteen I think. It used to be bright red and chipped and to tell you the truth I liked it better that way. One of Grandpa Geo's friends refinished it and Cate rescued it. When you get here we can sit by the window and I'll sing you lullabyes.

 

Here is your armoire. I know it's not finished just yet but the weather has been very uncooperative. So really, give mommy and daddy a break. We're only human and we want to see you.

 

Now would be good.....